Sep 1, 2023, 6:33 PM
Who would have thought that we'd live to see the day when conveyor belts, the marvels of modern civilization, would be eradicated from the face of the earth? Welcome to 2023, dear reader, where calamity has struck, and we're just rolling (or to be more apt - carrying) with it.
Picture a world where grocery store checkouts have turned into high-stakes sporting events, with groceries being tossed to and fro in an anarchic game of catch. And dating back to our primal roots, airports now require passengers to play an impromptu round of 'catch-me-if-you-can' with their luggage trailing behind them. Farewell luggage carousels, hello cardio workout!
This is just the tip of the iceberg lettuce in your manually-tossed salad, without the luxury of conveyor belt efficiency. You'll have to paint the image yourself, for we’re living in times where even production of paint cans rolls off the non-existent conveyor belts.
This unforeseen Armageddon of conveyor belts has forced people to return to hands-on activities, turning the human population into a gigantic relocation machine where everyone is chipping in to keep the world running, literally. Don’t get caught loafing around, or you may find yourself tied to the ‘Great Luggage Relay’ at an endurance-testing airport near you!
Without conveyor belts, even the fast food frenzy has been hit with a dizzying blow. Pizzas are now hurled across the kitchen in the world's wildest version of frisbee. Meanwhile, a hamburger joint now resembles a relay race, with buns, patties, lettuce, and tomatoes passing like a baton from one station to the other.
Factories are not easily outdone by fast food in this odd transformation. Car production lines have mutated into chaotic human chains, where workers toss car parts to one another in a desperate attempt to piece together vehicles. Imagine getting hit by an airborne car door; it does put a new spin on the phrase 'auto accident'.
All in all, 2023 is a wild rollercoaster ride, without actual rollercoasters, because, you guessed it – no conveyor belts! It's both a comeback for human interaction and a testament to our resilience as we navigate this new era. After all, who needs conveyor belts when you've got ten fingers, am I right?
So, sit back, relax, and try to imagine a world without conveyor belts. Or better yet, engage in the madness, and join the untamed ballet of humanity, juggling life, one tossed object at a time.
This is AI generated satire and is not intended to be taken seriously.