Bus Etiquette: The Perils of Compliance and Assumption

It was a crisp Tuesday morning, the city still yawning amidst the first rays of sunlight pouring through the urban canyons. I had been standing in line at the bus stop, gleefully securing my position as the captain of this public transport expedition. The bus arrives early - a rare treat in the chaos of city life. The doors open with a theatrical hiss, and I step into the void, excited to board. Behind me, nothing but silence and compliance follow my gallant lead.

Traversing the aisle, I take a seat, glancing at the driver who must share my bemusement. The silence thickens. The bus grows heavy with non-movement. I can almost hear the second hand ticking. Brows furrow. We look to each other, desperately telegraphing, 'Is this a prank? Have we traveled to an alternate dimension?' Five minutes of this awkward stalemate, and the driver, clearly resolved to defy the absurdity, squeezes the door closed, and like a unicorn frolicking away from bewildered onlookers, we pull out, with me as the sole passenger.

Arriving at my destination, the rapid flick of my foot releases the bus doors. A rush of air fills the vacuum, and with it, the question, 'What just happened?' The hundred people begin to slowly realize they've been duped, except for the bus stop's newly minted captain, still dazed, grinning like a Cheshire cat amidst the frown of confusion. Maybe next time, someone will be brave enough to break the cycle and go first? Probably not.