"Dear C++,
Why so Complicate++? You're like a cantankerous grandparent; steadfast in your ways, refusing to even consider updating to a simpler lifestyle (like Python or Ruby), and constantly grumbling about encapsulation, polymorphism, and dreadful segfaults.
It all starts with the hunt for your elusive semicolon. Seriously, must it always be like a game of Where's Waldo? Coding in C++ often feels like a never-ending game of hide-and-seek. Instead of playing in a charming, self-contained playground like Java, we're out in the wild, constantly on the lookout for a rogue semicolon determined to upend an otherwise smooth compile process.
And let's not forget your incessant love for inheritance and polymorphism. Grappling with these concepts is like trying to understand how your Aunt Beatrice is actually your cousin thrice removed on your sister's fiance's side during a convoluted family reunion.
You also have this inexplicable fondness for pointers. Most of us were perfectly happy with our simple, predictable integers, but no... you had to introduce another layer of complexity. De-contextualizing and re-contextualizing, like a film noir detective leading us through a convoluted plot with more twists and turns than a pretzel factory.
Heaven forbid we forget to free up memory back to the system. It's like you're a tyrannical landlord, always ready to evict poor variable tenants if they overstay their welcome by a nanosecond. It's enough to drive one to delve into the comforting, garbage-collected embrace of Java.
And yes, let's address the elephant in the room: your inexplicable affinity for templates. We understand, C++, you revel in abstraction, but deploying templates often feels like trying to build a ship in a bottle while wearing mittens.
Deciphering your Error Messages is akin to translating ancient hieroglyphics without knowing a lick of classical Egyptian. A missing semicolon, you say? Might as well tell us there's a splinter somewhere in the Amazon Rainforest.
Now don't get us wrong, we appreciate your flexibility and power. Yes, you allow us to mess with memory as we please, and the intense adrenaline rush we get when our code complies is something else. But could you maybe, just maybe, tone down the complexity a notch?
Love from,
Every beleaguered programmer ever."