Geronimo! And hold your horses too, as in a dramatically daring deviation from Daleks, the Doctor's going to dive, not into a TARDIS, but into a abnormous heap of hay. Ladies, Gentlemen, and Timelords of all epochs, in an unprecedented and hoof-pounding twist of television, prepare to witness the famed Gallifreyan take on a fresh physical form. Yes, you heard it right. The mad man in a blue box is now, wait for it, a party-loving, magic-wielding pony!
On swapping the sonic screwdriver for a cutie mark, show screed-writers seem confident that this development will gallop ahead with making the Doctor Who lore more inclusive, fascinating, and neigh-borly! Our beloved Time Lord, usually prone to sudden regenerations, has previously gone through an array of distinguished humanoid forms but this turn of events is, quite frankly, horsin' around on another level.
But fret not, fair fans of the fantastical franchise, for our sources unveil that this transitional trot won't unfurl without the characteristic quirks and thrills. The witty banter with the companions would now include vigorous neighs and snorts and the intense, chin wagging conundrums of the universe could be solved with a mere flick of a majestic tail.
No more striking up alliances against overwhelming odds. The new Doctor will use his sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia, obtained after indulging in extra-cold snow cones imported from Ice Warrior territory, as his choice of deterrent against the Villain of the Week. Daleks would rush to project plunger-based damage only to find themselves cowering in fear.
And just think of the alien landscapes, tweaked for equestrian exploration. Every vast field, an avenue for allegorical adventures. Every rainbow, a potential portal. Every haystack, a sentient lifeform. Welcome to whimsy, Who style.
And what about the sonic screwdriver? We hear you ask. Fear not, the esteemed device will now sport a manure setting – for those times when the horse dung really hits the fan. Equip one and watch the Cybermen run off with wires flailing to the nearest valet service.
We bet you're wondering about companions. Well, rumor has it that the erstwhile mare of honor, Rose Tyler, can be expected to return as Rose the Draconequus, a sassy creature, half pony, half dragon, sporting a striking bad wolf cutie mark. One does wonder how the romantic tension will play between a dragon-pony and a pony-pony.
Timey-Wimey could also take a whole new pasture-filled meaning literally. Who could resist the allure of temporal hay bales appearing and disappearing in the blink of an equine eye? We certainly can't!
In the grand drumroll of the universe, the beat of the hooves will just add an extra oomph. Imagine the Doctor fleeing from danger at an ever galloping pace, leaving a trail of sparkles in its wake, causing the weeping angels themselves to giggle in disbelief.
So, let the sonic neigh resonate across every corner of Equestria! Prepare to saddle up, Whovians – horseplay is about to hit a new level of epic. Now you know what they'd mean when they say, ‘Giddy-up, Doctors!’