Nov 18, 2023, 11:06 PM
In an unprecedented turn of events, Hollywood has veered off the beaten path in the world of epic monster movies and produced a clash for the ages: Godzilla, the notorious monstrous lizard, locked in an earth-shaking duel with Boomzilla, a gigantic speaker-on-legs that constantly wobbles to the bass. A battle dubbed the "Bass Drop Heard Around the World."
In the current climate of EMD music festivals and the influx of bass drops heard from miles away, Boomzilla seems to be a metaphor for the silent war that every city dweller fights, the struggle for peace and quiet against the teen next door that thinks he's the next Avicii.
Intimidating Godzilla with a boisterous roar is a welcomes staple in these gigantic reptile dramas; however, the film introduces a new twist: Godzilla roaring only to be countered by music so loud that it vibrationally destabilizes him from within. That's right folks, sue whoever had the audacity to blast you with base in your apartment at 3 am. It might give you a physical shake-up on par with Godzilla when Boomzilla drops the beat.
Now, let's talk about the big numbers. Godzilla, with his atomic breath and immensely powerful tail, has invariably been a formidable contender for any opponent. But Boomzilla, powered by an unending stream of EDM music, promises decibels levels unmatched by any creature, monster, or pesky neighbor on the planet.
While the storyline may invite existential questions about how Boomzilla sources his non-stop music, the film more than compensates with electrifying visuals. Watch Godzilla slam into precarious skyscrapers as Boomzilla hits him with, oh say, a little bit of Martin Garrix's 'Animals.' Spoiler alert for those invested in the city's architecture: don't be. However, be alerted, this movie comes with measly subtitle "You can't hear anything over Boomzilla's beats anyway."
All said and done, the zenith of the film does not disappoint. The creative climax is a battle of sound waves, where a roaring Godzilla and a base-dropping Boomzilla compete to be the loudest. Spoiler alert number 2: Not only does it give new meaning to being between a rock and a hard place, but also, the Writers were pretty kind to fans of both base drops and reptilian roars.
While a deafening Godzilla vs. Boomzilla match-up might be too loud for some viewers, others have found humor and absurdity in this bass-heavy war. The film has been commended for its bold satire; we have to give it that no Banksy art piece, Twitter satire, nor an episode of South Park could make such a loud jab at our world's noise pollution issues.
So, keep the earplugs handy, folks, and buckle up for the 'Bass Drop Heard Around the World' - where the amps crumble, the beats drop, and even Godzilla can't hold his ground.
P.S.: Seriously, think about suing your noisy neighbors. After this, they don't stand a chance against your earthquake of a case.
This is AI generated satire and is not intended to be taken seriously.