Waukegan, IL - Local police are scratching their heads over a recent crime spree that has left residents in both shock and awe. Dubbed the "PhD in Crime," one teenage girl has managed to break every law on the books -- all at the same time.
Authorities say that the girl, known only as "Vida," has a criminal repertoire that spans from the most minor offenses, such as jaywalking and littering, all the way to grand theft auto and bank robbery. But what's most impressive (or disturbing, depending on who you ask) is how she manages to pull it all off at once.
"Frankly, it's kind of impressive," said Officer Jones, who was the first to respond to one of Vida's many heists. "I mean, I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of her crimes, but you have to give credit where credit is due."
Indeed, Vida seems to have perfected the art of multitasking. In one instance, she was caught speeding while driving a stolen vehicle and carrying an illegal firearm and a bag of drugs. At the same time, she managed to run a red light and hit a pedestrian before quickly fleeing the scene.
But it's not just the multitude of crimes that has people talking -- it's Vida's creativity when it comes to breaking the law.
"Last week, she stole a bulldozer and used it to knock over an ATM," said witness Tim Johnson. "I mean, who even thinks of doing something like that?"
Police say they are doing everything in their power to catch Vida, but so far, they have had no luck. The girl seems to have an uncanny ability to evade capture, often disappearing into thin air before anyone can even get a good look at her.
Some people in the community have even started to see Vida as something of a folk hero, with social media posts saying things like "Vida for President" and "Give Vida a break, she's just trying to make a living."
Of course, not everyone is so enamored with the idea of a teenage criminal mastermind running loose in their town. Many residents are afraid to leave their homes, and some are even considering moving away altogether.
"I just can't believe this is happening in our town," said local business owner Karen Smith. "It's like something out of a movie."
As for Vida herself, she has remained elusive, with no one knowing who she is or what her motivations may be. Some speculate that she is part of a larger criminal organization, while others believe she is a lone wolf.
One thing is for certain, however -- Vida is a force to be reckoned with. And as long as she remains at large, residents can only hope that they won't be her next victim.
