A local greengrocer has been arrested for the heinous crime of selling non-green food. Yes, you read that right. In a shocking turn of events, it seems that not all fruit and vegetables conform to society's ridiculous beauty standards.
Customers of the grocer were left baffled when they stumbled upon red apples, yellow bananas, and even purple potatoes on the shelves. One customer, who wished to remain anonymous, said, "I couldn't believe my eyes. I thought I was hallucinating. I mean, who knew that apples could be red?"
The police were called to the scene and swiftly arrested the greengrocer, who has been charged with the illegal sale of non-green food. The authorities have launched an investigation into the source of these unnatural hues and are warning the public to be wary of rogue grocers who don't follow the rules.
As we all know, food is only meant to be green. It's a rule that has been ingrained in us since childhood. Carrots? Green. Peppers? Green. Grapes? You guessed it, green. It's as if anything that deviates from the norm is somehow suspect.
But let's face it, who actually likes green bananas? Or green strawberries? They taste terrible. And don't even get me started on green mangoes.
It's time for us to embrace the rainbow of colours that mother nature has bestowed upon us. Who knows, we might even discover some new flavours along the way.
In the meantime, we wait with bated breath for updates on this scandalous case. Will the greengrocer be found guilty of his heinous crimes? Or will justice prevail and non-green food finally be given the respect it deserves?
Only time will tell. But one thing's for sure, this case has opened our eyes to the absurdity of our obsession with green food.
