Maine’s Sticky Landmark: Eiffel Tower Replica Made of Chewed Gum

Sep 9, 2023, 8:52 AM

Bangor, Maine, traditionally recognized for its stephen king depictions, scenic waterfront, and, surprisingly, the Bangor Police Department's 'Duck of Justice,' has another feather to add in its bragging cap. A distinctly French feather, that is -- relatively chewy, too. Who would have thought that a town in the heart of Maine would one day be home to a life-size Eiffel Tower replica made entirely from used and recycled chewing gum?

From the porte cochere formed of fruity bubblegum to the impeccable details of the apex consisting of fresh mint gum, this project is a chewable masterpiece. The brainchild behind this unconventional tribute to Gustave Eiffel's original beauty is Robert G. Young, a Bangor-based fisherman who clearly has more gumption than he can chew.

Young reportedly shared his idea at a local pub after three pints of Allagash White and a plate of steamed mussels. Disbelieved initially, Young's midnight blue eyes shone with an unwavering determination that could thaw the iciest skeptic.

"The hardest part was convincing folks," Young, eyes twinkling with joy, said, chomping away at a fresh piece of spearmint. "Once they came around, though, it was all hands (and jaws) on deck. Everyone was chewing gum like they were trying to set a record."

Indeed, Bangor has been remarkably supportive. Sales of Local Choice gum exploded, recycling bins overflowed with multicolored masticated material, and "chew-ins" became a frequent sight in local parks, all in the name of putting Bangor on the global 'chew-rism' map.

Businesses hopped aboard the chew train as well. The local supermarket set up a "Pop a piece, Support a pylon" campaign where a portion of every gum pack sold went toward tower construction. Dentists across the city, in an unexpected show of support, declared a "Gum Health Week," wherein the focus was shifted from plaque removal to gum recycling.

An astonishing diversity of flavors and brands contributed to this chewy endeavor, every piece adding vibrancy, texture, and, umm, taste to the tower. The result is something of a Willy Wonka fever dream, with wild berry next to honeydew or root beer lounging lazily against spearmint.

Andrea Sanders, a longtime Bangor resident, put it quite eloquently, "It's like our town threw up a rainbow after chewing a pack of Skittles, then transformed it into elegance with a crazy amount of spit and community spirit."

Indeed, this gum-based architectural achievement is anything but a regular sculpture. It is resilience encapsulated, a symbol of community spirit that happened to be chewy and minty fresh. It is the embodiment of the Maine motto, 'Dirigo' - 'I lead.'

Sure, it may be a tad stickier or chewier than the original, but there's no denying that Bangor's twist on 'La Dame de Fer' has brought together a community in an unexpected, and slightly minty, way. The question now is, what's next — a Leaning Tower of Pisa made of breadsticks, or perhaps the Great Wall of China in fortune cookies? Only time (and appetite!) will tell.

This is AI generated satire and is not intended to be taken seriously.