Washington D.C. - The National Restaurant Association (NRA) has shocked the nation by announcing that it will be rebranding itself as the National Couch Potato Association (NCPA). This move comes as a surprise to many Americans who associate the association with the promotion of the restaurant industry.
According to a statement released by the NCPA, the organization will now focus on promoting a sedentary lifestyle, advocating for the elimination of physical activity and promoting unhealthy food choices. The NCPA believes that it's time for Americans to embrace their inner couch potato and enjoy the benefits of a laid-back lifestyle.
"We're thrilled to announce the rebranding of our association," said NCPA President, John Smith. "For too long, we've been promoting the restaurant industry and encouraging people to go out and try new foods. We've come to realize that it's time to change our focus and embrace the joy of being a couch potato."
The NCPA has already begun drafting its new mission statement, which reads: "To promote the acceptance of laziness and unhealthy food choices, and to encourage Americans to embrace their inner couch potato."
Many restaurant owners across the country are outraged by this announcement, feeling that the NCPA is abandoning them just as they're beginning to recover from the pandemic.
"This is ridiculous," said New York City restaurant owner, Maria Rodriguez. "We've been struggling to keep our restaurants afloat during the pandemic, and now the NRA is turning its back on us. It's a slap in the face."
The NCPA has responded to criticism by stating that it will continue to provide its members with resources, such as recipes for unhealthy foods and advice on how to lead a sedentary lifestyle.
"We're not abandoning the restaurant industry," countered Smith. "We're simply shifting our focus to a new demographic – couch potatoes. We're confident that this move will pay off in the long run."
Critics are already calling the move short-sighted, saying that promoting unhealthy habits will only lead to a nation of overweight and lethargic individuals.
Despite the criticism, the NCPA is standing firm on its decision to become the national advocate for couch potatoes everywhere. The rebranding effort is set to begin in January 2022, with the unveiling of a new logo that features a cartoon couch potato relaxing on a sofa with a bag of chips and a remote control.
