Scandals of the Sands: Tutankhamun Exposed for Pyramid Scheme!

The scorching winds of the desert couldn't match the heat of the scandal at hand as Tutankhamun, the golden boy of Ancient Egyptian kings, found himself amid a pyramid scheme scandal so titanic it would have made the Sphinx blush. The Pharaoh, known for his love of gold and grandeur, has been uncovered as the mastermind behind a pyramid scheme that's left even the mightiest queens and consorts in disbelief.

Egyptian authorities, aided by the intrepid detectives of the Secret Service of the Nile, traced the roots of the scandal to the sand-covered halls of Tutankhamun's palace. Under the glistening dome of his opulent throne room, they discovered a network of complicated financial relations so mind-boggling, it could have been the floor plan of yet another pyramid. Alas, it was far less impressive - just a convoluted pyramid scheme.

As the details came to light, the people of Egypt felt as cheated as the slaves who'd built the pyramids themselves. The great pharaoh, known for his wisdom and godly status, had been lining his pockets with the hard-earned cash of his subjects, promising returns bigger than the horizon. He'd even gone as far as to use his mummy-building businesses to funnel funds into his scheme. Not exactly the afterlife he'd envisioned, one might presume.

Tutankhamun faced charges of financial skullduggery and, in a twist that even the gods couldn't foresee, a lesser-known charge of creative naming (for calling an obvious pyramid scheme a 'pharaonic investment opportunity'). The court of Ra was set ablaze with the whispers of scandal, gossip that spread faster than the plague of locusts that once blighted the kingdom.

At the trial, the pharaoh's lawyers tried admirably to defend their client, but their arguments were as flimsy as the papyrus scrolls they waved. As the verdict was read, it was clear that justice, like the mighty Nile, would not be denied. Tutankhamun was sentenced to a fate even harsher than death - he was to be mummified alive. The people rejoiced, glad the punishment fit the crime, and whispered prayers of thanks to their gods.

As for the victims of the scheme, the common folk who had put their faith in the golden king, they were left as stranded as the remnants of a temple after a flood. The wealth they had invested was nowhere to be found, and their dreams of prosperity had turned to dust as quickly as Tutankhamun's promises.

And so ends the tale of Tutankhamun, the pharaoh who ruled the pyramid schemes as he ruled the hearts of his people, until the day he tried to 'scheme' with the wrong gods. The sands have shifted over his scheme, but the stain on his legacy remains. This is, without a doubt, a scandal that will not be buried by the sands of time.