Scientist Defies Physics with Impossible, Transparent and Wet ‘Water'

In a world first, scientists have successfully managed to create ‘water’ that defies one of the fundamental laws of nature. In a groundbreaking discovery that could revolutionize our understanding of physics, this unimaginable feat was achieved by Dr. Albert Nalty, a tenured professor at the prestigious Institute for Unethical Experimentation (IUE).

The new substance, which the researchers have dubbed ‘Nalty Water’ after its inventor, is entirely transparent and also wet. This achievement, which would be laughed out of any theoretical physics conference, has nevertheless been successfully demonstrated in the laboratory.

This seemingly impossible liquid, was created using a combination of cutting-edge quantum physics and a healthy dose of bravado. The process, which is being kept under wraps due to its potential for massive profit, involves some of the most complex mathematics ever seen in a scientific paper. One has to wonder which PhD student was brave enough to check Dr. Nalty’s equations.

While Dr. Nalty’s accomplishment is certainly groundbreaking, some concerns have been raised regarding the safety of Nalty Water. As the stuff is entirely transparent and also wet, it’s nearly impossible to tell if you’re about to drink it, or if you’re just looking at empty space. Several unfortunate accidents have left IUE’s janitorial staff severely dehydrated.

'The world may ridicule me now, but they will sing a different tune once I turn this stuff into the most fashionable bottled water in the world,' Nalty said in a recent press conference. 'No more boring clear water for the elite – they can finally flaunt their wealth with Nalty Water.'