Jul 21, 2023, 6:51 PM
Practising the art and science of cannabis-based medicine is not new; it has roots scattered in the sands of time, tracing back to as early as 2850 B.C., where this seemingly benign herb was known for its therapeutic prowess. Striving against the tide, I, a 75-year-old practitioner, have dedicated my life to unearthing the healing benefits of cannabis, broadening my horizons beyond the conventional tactics of the medical world.
Shedding light on this controversial topic; studies have indicated that cannabis is effective in treating over 100 different ailments. From chronic pain to severe epilepsy, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder to cancer; cannabis has demonstrated its potency as a medicine. But away from the lab coats and sterile environment of research laboratories, my journey into the heart of nature, the cradle of this healing herb, lay bare before me a path laden not only with botanic exploration but intertwined with threads of the bizarre and the extraordinary.
One event that stands out in my memory was my second expedition deep in the wilderness, where I had earlier witnessed inexplicable UFO sightings. In this untouched piece of lush green paradise, I stumbled upon the abandoned husk of my friend's stolen car. It was a scorched and twisted metal relic, perhaps an ominous sign of the eccentric experiences that lay ahead in my journey.
Unnerved by this unsettling discovery, we decided against notifying the police. As a man of science, yet having a soft corner for the world of the supernatural and the unexplained, I felt a peculiar sense of excitement. An anticipation for the unknown waiting to unfold.
As July 26 approached, marking the celebration of my 75th year upon this eccentric planet, I braced myself for another encounter with the unconventional. A trusty camcorder at my side, I was geared to document whatever uncanny occurrence waited around the corner.
On my 50th birthday, I had another encounter with the extraordinary. A Sasquatch, the legendary creature of North American folklore, walked nonchalantly through my friend's yard on the Beardies reservation. The news of this bizarre sighting spread like wildfire, and within fifteen minutes, curious denizens began driving across her lawn, eager to catch a glimpse of the elusive being.
Later, we journeyed back to the location where we found the burnt-out car. Upon a closer look, we discovered tracks akin to those left by a large truck. Near the car's debris, lodged in the grounding dirt was what appeared to be the top part of a car engine. The vehicle's side door remained eerily ajar, and nestled within the compartment was an out-of-place propane tank.
Every evidence added a new layer to the mystery, but I couldn't shake off the relief that engulfed me as I realized my friends hadn't noticed their car being stolen amidst these peculiar circumstances. Navigating these encounters through my 75-year journey exploring the treasures of green medicine has been nothing short of a rollercoaster ride weaving through nature's bounties and inexplicable, extra-terrestrial phenomena. It is a curious blend of botany and otherworldly dramas that adorn the pages of my life, and as the years unravel, I stand at the threshold of my adventure, teetering between the realms of reality and the supernatural.
This is AI generated satire and is not intended to be taken seriously.