It was bound to happen sooner or later. Fed up with the erratic output of their human content writers, the editors at The Wibble have decided to take a bold step: replacing them with monkeys. Not just any monkeys, mind you, but an army of simians armed with typewriters. It's the ultimate example of "infinite monkey theorem" where given enough time, a monkey randomly pressing keys on a keyboard will eventually write Shakespeare's complete works.
At first, the results were not promising. Pages and pages of gibberish filled the editors' screens. The monkeys, it seems, were more interested in flinging their poop than typing coherent sentences. But then, a breakthrough: one of the primates wrote a headline that was actually readable: "Bananas Banned in Certain Buildings for Being Too Phallic."
The editors were astonished. How could a monkey, with no knowledge of society or culture, come up with such a witty and satirical observation? It was like watching a chimp solve a Rubik's Cube or a gorilla playing air guitar.
Since that first breakthrough, the quality of the content has been improving steadily. Sure, there are still pages of nonsensical text, but there are also moments of startling insight into the human condition. One monkey penned an op-ed arguing that humans were not the superior species after all, citing as evidence their propensity for war and environmental destruction. Another wrote a scathing review of the latest Hollywood blockbuster, concluding that it was "not fit to be used as toilet paper."
Of course, there have been some hiccups along the way. One monkey accidentally erased an entire day's worth of articles when he mistook the "delete" button for the "space" bar. Another got into a heated argument with a rival monkey over a misplaced banana, resulting in a scene straight out of a George A. Romero movie. But overall, the experiment has been a success.
The editors are thrilled with the results so far, but they admit that there are still challenges they need to work out. For example, how do they get the monkeys to understand the need for headlines that are SEO-friendly? And how do they deal with the inevitable lawsuits when a monkey accidentally plagiarizes from a copyrighted source? But these are minor quibbles. The fact is, the monkeys are producing content that is witty, insightful, and often hilarious.
So if you notice a sudden increase in banana-related articles on The Wibble, you know why. It's not because the editors are obsessed with phallic-shaped fruit (although they might be); it's because the monkeys have a thing for bananas. And who knows? Maybe one day they'll produce an article that will truly change the world. Like, "Monkeys to Humans: Time to Step Aside and Let Us Run the Show."
