Breaking news: Non-existent article fails to capture nation's attention
2023-06-04
In a shocking turn of events, the highly anticipated article entitled 'This article does not exist' has failed to make headlines. Despite its intriguing title, readers have expressed disappointment upon discovering that the article, in fact, does not exist at all. Experts suggest this lack of content may have contributed to the article's underwhelming reception. Stay tuned for updates on whether any action will be taken against the elusive author responsible for this literary mishap.
New Study Finds CTA Signs Designed by Toddlers More Effective than Current Ones
2023-06-04
A groundbreaking study has found that CTA signs designed by toddlers are nearly 50% more effective at guiding commuters than the current ones. Read on to learn more about this revolutionary discovery.
Man Named McWriter Seeks to Become Athlete Despite Obvious Handicap
2023-06-04
Bob McWriter has set his sights on a new career path, despite the fact that his very last name makes it clear he was not meant for athletic pursuits. Can he overcome this seemingly insurmountable obstacle and become a success story? Or will he simply live up to his name and fail miserably? Find out in our exclusive interview with Bob McWriter himself.
Grizzly bear owners shocked to discover they are not giant cuddly teddy bears
2023-06-04
The latest viral trend on TikTok has left owners of grizzly bears shocked and horrified when they discovered that these massive mammals are not actually giant cuddly teddy bears. Wildlife experts warn of the dangers of domesticating such wild animals and urge everyone to stick to their regular house pets instead.
Antarctic Penguins Establish 'Flipper-nation', Declare War on US and Request Joining UN and NATO
2023-06-04
'Flipper-nation' has officially been established in Antarctica, with Emperor Penguins leading the charge. The new penguin government has made bold moves requesting to join the United Nations and NATO while also declaring war on the United States. Sources say the penguins have been flying drones over US airspace as a show of force. The question now is: will the US take this seriously, or just laugh it off as a silly prank? Check out the flag design created by a penguin artist to represent the newly-formed nation!
Banned: The Letter You Can't Write
2023-06-04
In what many are calling a linguistic coup, the letter A has been banned from use in all forms of communication. Find out how language lovers are coping in this brave new world where 'A' is a dangerous letter to use.
Breaking Fryer: UK Fish and Chip Shop Owner Revealed to be Real-Life Walter White
2023-06-04
In a stunning turn of events, a small-town fish and chip shop owner in the UK has been exposed as the real-life Walter White. Customers are shocked to learn that this unassuming businessman has been running a secret meth lab in the back room of his shop for years. Stay tuned for updates on this breaking story as the authorities work to bring this fish fryer to justice.
Clacton-on-Sea declares independence, Danny Sloggett becomes Prime Minister, UN left scratching their heads
2023-06-04
The sleepy British seaside town of Clacton-on-Sea has shocked the world by declaring independence and appointing a local man, Danny Sloggett, as their new Prime Minister. The new country has also announced drastic changes, including mandatory fish and chips on Fridays and a ban on seagulls. The UN has admitted the new country, but is said to be confused about how to address Danny Sloggett in official diplomatic channels.
Clacton-on-Sea declared UK's new capital, Jaywick miraculously wealthy overnight
2023-06-04
In a shocking turn of events, the small coastal town of Clacton-on-Sea has been named the new capital of the UK, while nearby Jaywick has reportedly experienced a sudden and unexpected boom in wealth. The Prime Minister has yet to comment on the decision, but sources say the move was based on Clacton's charming seaside atmosphere and affordable housing market. Meanwhile, Jaywick residents are said to be stunned by their newfound riches, which some speculate may be the result of a cursed treasure being discovered in the town's marshlands. Stay tuned for updates on this bizarre and hilarious story.
Cheese with a bang: The explosive secret behind local producer's product
2023-06-04
A local cheese producer has revealed their secret ingredient that makes their product irresistibly explosive. Find out what it is and how it's causing a stir in the cheese industry, in this explosive new article from The Wibble.
Local English Teacher Admits Their Fluent English Was Just a Guessing Game
2023-06-04
In a stunning confession, a local English teacher revealed they have been faking their fluent English skills all along. Turns out, they have just been guessing their way through class and hoping their students wouldn't catch on. The school board is currently investigating the matter, but it looks like English class may never be the same at this school.
The Camera Head Epidemic: A New Form of Selfie Culture?
2023-06-04
Reports are emerging of people going missing and returning with their heads replaced with cameras. Is this a bizarre new trend in the selfie-crazed world we live in, or something more sinister? We investigate the phenomenon and its impact on society, from the rise of amateur paparazzi to the ethics of body modification.
Local Man Becomes Internet Sensation for Actually Reading Terms and Conditions
2023-06-04
A local man's unlikely heroic act of reading through the long and tedious Terms and Conditions has caught the attention of the internet. Find out how one man's determination to fully understand a software agreement ended up making him a viral sensation overnight!
State Government Grants Arachnid Status to Eight-Legged Chicken
2023-06-04
In a historic move, a chicken with eight legs has been officially recognized as a spider by the state government. The chicken's owner is now entitled to receive arachnid-related benefits and the chicken has been moved into a spider exhibit at the local zoo. Experts are baffled by this new development and animal rights activists are up in arms about the treatment of this 'Spicken'.
Man shocked to discover garden now smells like flowers after planting 1000 of them
2023-06-04
A man in suburbia complained about the overwhelming smell of flowers in his garden, only to realize it was the result of him intentionally planting 1000 of them. The man, who has now dubbed himself the 'Flower King', has been seen strutting around his neighborhood wearing a crown made entirely of daffodils.
Breaking News: Lasagna Renamed 'B Lasagna' Due to Secret Ingredient
2023-06-04
In a shocking revelation, it has been discovered that the reason lasagna has been renamed 'B Lasagna' is because of a secret ingredient - bacon! Apparently, the popular Italian dish was not meaty enough for some and the addition of bacon was deemed necessary. But why keep it a secret? We investigate the mysterious case of 'B Lasagna'.
Scientists Develop Camera that Captures Smells But Can't Find a Use For It
2023-06-04
In a breakthrough for sensory technology, scientists have created a camera that captures smells. However, they are finding it difficult to find a practical use for this invention. Stay tuned to learn more about this quirky technology and the bizarre ways scientists are testing it.
Local town baffled as residents return covered in crystals
2023-06-04
A mysterious phenomenon has taken over the small town of Wibble, as multiple reports have surfaced of people disappearing without a trace, only to return covered head-to-toe in glittering crystals. The town has been left in a state of confusion and wonder as they try to figure out the cause of this bizarre occurrence. Will the crystals bring good fortune or bad luck? Only time will tell.
Democrats and Republicans Unite to Build Wall Around Florida to Teach People About Stupidity
2023-06-04
In a shocking move, the Democratic Party and Republican Party have decided to unite and build a wall around Florida. Their goal? To turn the entire state into a lesson about how stupid people can be. The article explores this unprecedented political move and the potential consequences for the Sunshine State.
Real-life Shrek discovered, immediately met with extermination
2023-06-04
In a shocking turn of events, a real-life Shrek has been found living in a swamp in rural America. However, before he could begin his beloved ogre life, he was quickly met with extermination by local authorities. This tragic news has left the fairy-tale community in mourning, with many wondering if there will ever be another chance for a real-life ogre to exist in our modern world.