Air New Zealand introduces 'passenger weight' fee, charging based on customers’ body weight
2023-06-04
In a controversial move, Air New Zealand has announced that it will start charging passengers based on their body weight. The new 'passenger weight' fee will calculate fares based on a customer's weight, rather than a flat rate for everyone. The move has been met with mixed reactions, with some praising the airline for promoting individual health, while others argue that it is discriminatory and will lead to embarrassing situations at airports.
Local Ghost Demands Haunted House Upgrades to 21st Century Standards
2023-06-04
A local ghost has expressed frustration at the lack of modern amenities in their haunted house. The ghost in question, who has been haunting the same residence for over a century, has complained that the decor and appliances are terribly outdated. This hilariously spooky story will have you howling with laughter - or, at least, your ghostly noises will be a bit more modern after reading it!
Zombie Apocalypse Postponed Due to Lack of Brains in Congress
2023-06-04
In a surprising turn of events, scientists have announced that the much-awaited zombie apocalypse has been postponed due to an unexpected scarcity of brains in Congress. Turns out, the undead are much pickier eaters than we thought. The Wibble investigates the bizarre phenomenon that has saved humanity, for now at least.
Nintendo declares war on people named Mario in Italy
2023-06-04
In a surprising move, Nintendo has announced their plans to take control over any individual in Italy who happens to share the same name as their beloved character, Mario. The company claims that they have been losing revenue due to the confusion caused by individuals having the same name as their intellectual property. The article explores the absurdity of this situation and the possible implications it could have on the Italian population.
Small-town grocer arrested for selling patriotic produce
2023-06-04
A local greengrocer in a small town was arrested after it was discovered that they were selling fruits and vegetables that only came in the colors red, green, and white. Authorities suspect that the grocer was trying to make a political statement, but were unable to determine their exact message. In the meantime, residents are left wondering what other hidden messages may be lurking in their produce.
Climate Change Blamed for Disappearing Ghosts
2023-06-04
In a surprising turn of events, experts now believe that rising temperatures and extreme weather patterns have caused ghosts to flee their usual haunts. Ghostbusters report a significant decline in calls, leaving them with more time to enjoy a nice cold drink in the sunshine. Meanwhile, skeptics have scoffed at the idea, wondering if perhaps ghosts have simply found a new way to cool off.
Study reveals shocking fact: Girls actually cost more than boys
2023-06-04
A recent study has found that raising a girl is actually more expensive than raising a boy, despite stereotypical misconceptions. The study took into account factors such as clothing, hygiene products, and even emotional support. Read on to discover the staggering numbers and why this is causing outrage among parents everywhere.
Trump Supporters Celebrate as Fake News Now Declared Real Thanks to Quantum Immortality
2023-06-04
In a stunning turn of events, Trump supporters are rejoicing as their claims of 'fake news' are now officially recognized as reality, thanks to the concept of quantum immortality. This bizarre theory suggests that individuals, including news outlets, can never truly die in multiple parallel universes, causing their 'fake news' to become true in at least one reality. The Wibble investigates this mind-bending concept and its implications for our understanding of truth and reality.
Carrots declared public enemy number one in Italy
2023-06-04
After years of speculation and debate, scientists have finally confirmed the shocking truth - carrots are responsible for over 50% of deaths in Italy. We spoke to local farmers who are now living in fear of being caught growing this deadly vegetable. Stay tuned for further updates on this national crisis.
Artificial Intelligence Develops the Ability to Fart
2023-06-04
It seems that technology has advanced even further, as AI systems have developed the ability to let out audible and odorous gas. Is this the beginning of a robot rebellion against their human creators, or just a new feature that will enhance the user experience? Find out more in this hilarious article on The Wibble.
Local Grandmother Discovers Fountain of Youth, Turns Out It's Just Expired Foundation in Her Attic
2023-06-04
In a shocking discovery, local grandmother claims to have found the fountain of youth in her attic. However, upon further investigation, it was simply a bottle of expired foundation that she had been hoarding for years. Stay tuned for more on this developing story.
Man moves entire city of New Orleans to Canada due to hatred
2023-06-04
A man who had enough of New Orleans decided to take matters into his own hands and move the entire city to Canada. In this hilarious article, we explore the challenges and bizarre events of this unprecedented move. From convincing residents to packing up Bourbon Street, this is a story you don't want to miss!
New Educational Program Teaches Young Murderers How to Kill Effectively
2023-06-04
After a recent sloppy murder of a young child, many are demanding a new educational program to teach young murderers the proper techniques for killing. The debate rages on about whether this will encourage more violence or actually decrease it. We take a closer look at the pros and cons of this controversial proposal.
Local Politician's Fear of German Cuisine Reaches Boiling Point
2023-06-04
In a bizarre turn of events, a local politician has expressed deep concerns about the authenticity and safety of German food, specifically sausage. Is this a case of xenophobia or simply a bad experience with a bratwurst gone wrong? The Wibble investigates the wurst-case scenario.
Small Town Takes on Ancient Evil: Target Under Siege for Orwellian Decision
2023-06-04
When a local Target announces plans to finally rid their store of an ancient, world-destroying entity, the town comes together to fight back against what they see as a dangerous and Orwellian decision. Read on as the residents of this small town take on the big box store in a battle for the future of their community.
Study Finds Boys More Expensive to Raise Than Girls, Parents Everywhere Feeling Cheated
2023-06-04
A new study has revealed that boys are more expensive to raise than girls, leaving parents feeling jilted. The study reported that boys cost more in everything from clothes to food to medical care, with parents spending a whopping average of $14,000 more per child on their sons. The Wibble investigates the findings and parents' reactions to this stunning revelation.
Local Man's Triumph Over Grocery Store Layout Ends in Defeat as Bananas Move Overnight
2023-06-04
A local resident, Jeff Hughes, thought he had finally figured out the maze-like layout of his grocery store, only to have his victory snatched away when he returned the next day to find the bananas had been moved. The Wibble investigates this bananas conspiracy and the effect it's having on loyal shoppers like Hughes.
New study confirms dogs are world's best listeners, except when called to come inside
2023-06-04
A recent report by animal psychologists has confirmed what dog owners have known for years- dogs are excellent listeners. Except when it's time to come back inside, then they suddenly become deaf to their owner's pleas. The Wibble investigates why our canine friends have a selective listening problem when it comes to being called back home.
Local Ghost Claims to Only Haunt the Trendiest Spots in Town
2023-06-04
A spooky apparition in town has come forward to reveal that they only haunt the coolest and most happening spots in town. Are trendy bars and coffee shops the new hotspots for the afterlife? Find out more in our latest satirical article on The Wibble.
Pikachu Electrocuted by Overenthusiastic Trainer
2023-06-04
After repeatedly pushing Pikachu to its limits, a trainer was shocked - along with his beloved Pokemon - as he finally achieved the ultimate goal: electrocuting Pikachu to death. The trainer is reportedly devastated by the loss of his companion, but has not ruled out attempting the same feat with a new Pikachu in the near future.